Just Blah

I know I haven't posted for a long time.  I am on a new antidepressant and I do not like it. This is the third one I have been on.  The tamoxifen can cause depression though that's not really what it does to me.  I feel real irritable and mad all the time.  The first one made me feel jittery all the time so quit it.  The second seemed to work well and I took it for a few months til they decided it would cause problems with the tamoxifen.  I quit it cold turkey.  Learned my lesson.  Won't do that again.  Five days after I stopped it I had a complete meltdown.  They tall you it takes awhile to build up in your system but it must take five days to leave it.  OK the problem with this one is that it seems to suck the life right out of me.  I don't want to do anything and my creativity seems to have died .  But since I learned my lesson last time I'm waiting to see the doc and wean myself off slowly.  Then I plan on doing without any kind.  Only one person says I am a grouch (my husband). Ill just be my grouchy little self.  And maybe then Ill feel like doing things again like writing on here.